It's more than music

The truth is that coming up with ideas to write down for this happiness project was harder than I anticipated. I never thought that it would be hard to come up with things that made me happy. Then I realized that as I actually typed my blogs the one thing they all had in common was that I wrote them down while listening to music.

"Music is my escape"

A lot of people refer to music as a Savior from their life, something that makes them escape from reality. I feel like for me it is what traps me in my thoughts. I never really thought about it until now but I honestly torture myself with my play lists. 

The types of music I listen to vary so much it is not even funny. It all depends on what mood I am. I can go from listening to old hip hop, pop, rap, house music, and then next thing you know I'm like crying listening to Mexican music. I listen to music for two reasons: Either I'm really happy and just feeling it or I'm really just laying there starring at the sealing thinking about life like my home girl up there in that picture. 

I will bring up this example only because it applies here.  A couple posts later you would think I'm over it by now right? Well anyways my ex and I had these songs that we would always listen to in the car and I find myself listening to them over and over again post break up. I wouldn't like cry or anything I would just torture myself by listening to them and it sounds so petty when I actually think about it but I would still do it. Maybe as a coping method? I have no idea but I would find myself up at 3 a.m. not being able to sleep but playing these songs until it would physically hurt. Lately I have done this less often and I honestly feel like all I needed was time. I used to not even say his name without wanting to burst out into tears. As more time goes by those memories fade and the songs end.

I have also realized how much music can affect a person. It can make you smile and laugh just like it can make you break down and reevaluate your whole life. It is one of those things that can affect your whole mood in just a press of a button. Music artists are so clever. They write down all these feelings and convert them into a song that you can relate to. I can see why some people rely on music to express themselves. There are in fact a lot of things that are written as lyrics that a lot of people could never own up to and express for themselves. I also love the fact that there are so many different music genres. I have never met someone that doesn't like music. No matter how weird or out of my comfort zone their music is they at least listen to something.

Music doesn't help me express myself or helps me avoid my feelings. For me it helps me face them. When I listen to something that I can relate to it makes me face my problems by wanting to do something about them, wanting to find a solution, or even to find ways to cope with them. Music makes me think  A LOT. Sometimes too much. If I have no one to talk to or no one that understands me, I just put my headphones and let my thoughts consume me. By listening to music I can go from being unhappy and stuck, to being inspired and optimistic. Or from being happy to crying and eating Ice cream at 3 a.m. it just kind of depends on my play list.